Dating after divorce at 40

07 Aug

On actually being in a relationship with him, I realized I’d assigned far too much weight to what I knew, or thought I knew, about his first marriage.

It’s best to keep your current status quiet until you feel confident in your relationship.A previous marriage, no matter how short, is the relationship equivalent of earning a college degree. Having been married doesn’t mean you’re any better or worse at relationships than someone who’s never tied the knot.If you’ve been married before, the theory goes, you must have the ability to commit. On its own, the word “divorced” conveys only two things: 1) that the person was, at some point, united with another person in a legally sanctioned arrangement; and 2) it ended, and not because one of the partners died.When men learn that I wed later in life and had a marriage even Hollywood would call “brief,” some assume I’m commitment-phobic, that I stink at relationships, or that I just wanted to get married before I turned 40.A more thoughtful examination of my relationship history would show that I had three long-term relationships from 1992 to 2008. Another lasted from 1996 to 2001 and was ultimately more significant than my marriage.