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23 Apr

But three years ago, the writer went through a 'bad breakup' with an Italian man, with whim she thought she would one day have children.When he changed his mind, Shelasky still felt 'overwhelmingly ready' to become a parent.'So I decided to pursue motherhood with every bone in my body and every buck in my bank account,' she wrote.She wasn't concerned with how her love life would turn out during those nine months, and felt confident that her personality and her approach to dating would remain the same.'I experienced enough great love and great sex and great heartbreak for one lifetime and if it never happened again, so be it! Women are so afraid of changing after a baby, but I knew my core and my soul would stay the same.'Shelasky, who opened up about her dating life in a candid essay for Lenny Letter earlier this week, recounted how her 'off-the-charts chemistry with on-the-fringe men' seemed to shape all her long-term relationships, which she didn't mind.'I was comfortable with this construction.I savored the challenge of seducing, then taming, these artists and outlaws,' she wrote.'It felt extremely light-hearted,' she added.'Like, "Sure, I'll go to that amazing Italian restaurant with you and eat carbonara and have some laughs! While she didn't become intimate with any of her dating partners, the writer felt 'desired and admired' during their outings.The birth of her daughter, Hazel, two years ago, did change her love life slightly.'I met with the most beautiful and affirming Single Moms by Choice; I read every book and blog on the donor decision.

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A single mother who kept dating during her pregnancy and after the birth of her baby has candidly detailed her experience — and described it as a lighthearted, enjoyable and slightly transformative time in her life.

Alyssa Shelasky, 40, had always wanted to be a mother.